Solitude

Moments in life just slip away,

Some just stick and stay,

Falling slowly onto the earth,

Today is all we have at hearth,

Some words impress the heart,

Some just hurt till you fall apart,

Few tears express the joy in the soul,

Few smiles hide the sorrowful hole,

Solitudes are precious reminders of friends,

Sinful happiness and playful interludes,

Traveling on a path you look behind,

A solitary journey with nowhere to go.

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My Journey through Life —with love {Part-4: Befriending love}

Befriending love

Next, we come to a complicated relationship. That’s the relationship between friends. Actually it’s a very simple relationship but tends to get complicated over time and people make it more complicated. It is also one of the most important relationships everyone goes through in their lifetime.

Friendship is important because by the time you realize about this relationship a person is grown up enough that the people around him or her can make an effect on their personality. The people that surround you are the people that will most likely define what you become. These are people who give their love, respect, friendship and trust to believe in you in every step and help you make the right decisions. It’s very true when people say show me your friends and I will tell you who you are. That is how important friends become in defining a person.

A person just chooses a person as a friend for what they are, something they like about the person and they tend to grow together and help each other in evolving as a better person. They are happy to just be together and are able to share everything about themselves with ease. These are friends who always look out for the well-being of the other and want the other to succeed always in life and share every milestone crossed with happiness.

Though it starts out in a very simple manner, very easy, no pressure, no rules it very soon becomes difficult sometimes. The one problem many face is the boundaries of this relationship, how far can it go, how many liberties you can take with your friend, what are the expectations etc etc., and these things tend to weigh the relationship down. More often than not other feelings creep in, jealousy, protectiveness, possessiveness etc., This is one emotion creating lots of problems in this relationship and also puts the relationship thru lots of stress and tests. Unlike other relationships so far discussed, one has to know the other person completely and trust is the most expensive gift one can receive or give to the other person. The foundation of the whole relationship stands on trust. Its very hard to get it back once you lose it in a person.

It is said love is like a violin, the music may stop now and then, but the strings remain forever. Similarly for friendship it is said that, friendship is like a china dish, once broken can be mended but the crack always remains. What it means is that love can be rekindled but the trust in a friendship is hard to find once you lose it. Feelings in a friendship are very deep rooted and every emotion here has taken its own time to develop.

As kids we really don’t know the intensity and gravity of feelings that goes into a friendship. Therefore the person, the kid hangs around with a lot becomes the ‘best friend’ but as adults we delve more into the persons likes and dislikes and we pick and choose our friends. Then you start sharing everything with the friend, every success, every disappointment, every idea, every little thing you do, in happiness and in sorrow friends are always together.

Every person who has a true friend knows how lucky they are to have the good fortune of having a good friend. These are the people who stick with us thru thick or thin, these are the people who do not judge us by what we have and what we do not have, these are the people who like us for what we are and have accepted us with all our shortcomings. These people do not try to change us but do look out for our benefit and good always. Now with so many good things going for this relationship, what goes wrong?

Its usually jealousy with a dash of possessiveness!

The relationship between friends is like a close knit family. People can’t get in very easily and once you get in you are not allowed to go out easily too. When a new person enters in then usually that person ends up putting a spoke in the wheel of a smooth running friendship.  For example: Say one of the friends is entering a new business and the other thinks it’s not a good idea and tries to talk him out of it. Sometimes a person might misunderstand it for standing in the way of the other person’s success. Another example is when one of the friends gets a new love interest then the protective instincts of the friend kicks in and when one tries to tell the other what’s right or wrong it’s not acceptable.

Usually when the friend has been protective in other circumstances their judgment is not questioned and is accepted but when the similar judgment is passed under the ‘love’ circumstances or about choosing your partner, its not accepted. The person being judged might be wrong sometimes too because they might be rushing to choose their partner and the ever loving, ever protective friend does not want their friend to get hurt. The person who is passing a judgment might sometimes be wrong because sometimes the friend feels threatened by the entry of a new person into their friend’s life. They are not sure if they can accept the time sharing between friends. The friendship feels threatened. This sometimes causes problems between friends.

But then again we come across those friendships that are so strong they withstand all tests and come out winners. These people might even say that if a friendship can get threatened simply by the entry of another person into their lives then that is not a true friendship at all.

Correct? Wrong.

A friendship is formed between humans and each human is as different as chalk and cheese from the other. And humans err. They have likes and dislikes. They are selfish. They are protective-possessive. And these things define the friendship so some may have gone through all these emotions to come out stronger. Whereas some may not have gone through all these emotions but just remained strong and untested.  This by no means can be called a battle lost and these people cannot be termed as weaklings. These people just did not have patience to explore all avenues, these people were just not confident enough to talk to the other friend about the problems or issues they have. They were just a bunch of unlucky people.

The depth of a friendship cannot be measured with the amount of time/years spent with the friend. People usually get confused and think that the more time they spend with a person the closer they are and they tend to get drawn into revealing themselves emotionally. They feel like since they have spent so much time with each other they have to reveal all their inner feelings. Another assumption people make is that they start thinking that the more they are together the more they have to reveal themselves to make it last, that’s not true; you don’t have to have a ‘tell all’ friend. It’s not a rule or necessary to tell them everything that happens to you. Also the notion that people believe in that there should be no secrets between friends is also wrong. Everybody has a right to live their lives, keep their secrets and if they say that you are not a true friend for hiding your feelings, then they are just trying to emotionally blackmail you to satisfy their curiosity.

The main reason for a friendship to last is RESPECT.

Everybody has to give the other person their due respect. One has to respect the other person’s wishes, privacy and individuality. That is what friendship is all about. And when this is achieved then that friendship is a bond that lasts forever.

I am not saying friends should always co-exist peacefully and should not have fights or arguments. Friendship is not always a walk through the park. There are lots of hurdles to be overcome, there will be lots of fights, debates and arguments but as long as each one respects the other person’s views and lets go of it when they have to then it doesn’t matter. If one can’t point out the mistakes in the friend and if one can’t respect the other person’s views then something is wrong in that relationship.

So we can say a friend is a person who makes you feel better, makes you a better person and puts in so much of his own goodness that together both become the best. If a person can get the best out of the other, if that person can make you laugh or cry, if that person can lead you from darkness unto light, if that person can satisfy some inner need in you however small or big then that person is a friend.

How happy am I with the kind of friends I have? I am very fortunate to have some very good friends but they are very few and I feel sad that I don’t have many more. I have often wondered why I didn’t have many friends.

One reason I don’t have many friends is that I never had a stand still life in a single place during my growing up years to form a close bond with anyone. My dad was in the kind of job that required him to move around from one place to another so we were constantly being uprooted from our bases and put into entirely new cultures and among new people. But even in this short period of time I was able to find some good friends. Some are friends I am not in touch with very frequently but they are my friends. I know that when I meet them I can connect with them and pick up the relationship from where I left it of. These are people I trust and respect and who in return trust and respect me.

Another pattern I have noticed in life is that in general men seem to have more friends than women. Why? Being a woman I questioned myself too as to why we women can’t have lot of friends. Speaking for myself I would like to say that maybe it’s because of the easy going nature of men and the insecure nature of a woman. Women by birth are very insecure and they constantly have a need to seek attention, security, respect etc from time to time. They tend not to seal a relationship by thinking that he or she is my friend so let me leave it at that, they try to keep it open by constantly having the need to be told that they are important to the other. This is a major drawback because a relationship needs to grow with time and if a person is still stuck at the basics of sealing or defining a relationship then it will never grow. It is bound to fall apart. It would require great patience and understanding from the other to convince them otherwise and who on earth has the patience to do it for a long time? Not many.

I have personally learnt a lot from my friends; each friend has only enriched me more and made me better than what I am. Each person has given me a lot to improve myself. I have always tried to take the good from them but sometimes I did take some things from some friends that would make me more rebellious or more defiant in my behavior. This mostly happened during my adolescent age wherein one gets so carried away with the possibilities around them and the freedom in their hands that one would end up doing things that they normally would not do but would get encouraged to do it in the company of their friends. But then like everything else you outgrow these too and they become just memories for you and your friends to talk about later on in life.

Do I feel I would have been a different person if not for the friends in my life? I would say, Yes. My friends have had a good influence over me. Over the years I have learnt from them and changed myself too. If one friend has taught me to be confident about myself, one has shown me how to voice out my feelings and to be stronger in what I believe in. One has made me realize that its ok to make mistakes as long as we do it only once and not repeat it again. Then there was the one who gave me lessons in human reproduction, telling me things you don’t learn in books. I also remember the friend who taught me how to dress properly and carry myself in public.  I got lessons in social etiquettes, and the importance of a good smile. So definitely everyone in my life has left their mark on me and they are reflected in everything I do and everything I am made out to be. Parents educate us only up to a certain point in our life, they lay our basic foundation but I feel friends take over later on when you are out on your own in the wide world. I have had ups and downs with my friends but I know who I can count on when the need comes. I also know there are some who will count on me to be with them, in their time of need. And you bet I will!

Today, in the age of media that travels at the speed of light, the world has become very small. Social networking sites like, Facebook, Twitter, Linked-In and instant messaging systems like Whatsapp, hangouts and so on have assisted in breeding and breaking friends. We now have long lost friends discovering each other and connecting with each other. People live across continents but are in touch with each other everyday. But then there is a saying, ‘Familiarity breeds contempt’! So the over familiarity has also managed to destroy few relationships. Its wrong to blame anyone or anything for it. A relationship can only be as strong as the people in it are. Over the years, I have lost few, found few and grew apart from a few. One thing I can say honestly is that each one of them have made a positive impact on my life. I can easily think of every friend I had or have and list out the ways in which they have shaped me. They may be out of sight today but they are definitely not out of mind. I salute them for all the good times we had!

Friends are the building blocks of our lives. If these building blocks are good and strong then that decides your future. They can make us or break us and in my case I can definitely say they have made me better and they are my friends for life. Let me end with a few meaningful quotes.

Here is what some famous people had to say about friendship:

  1. Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light. – Helen Keller
  2. Friendship… is not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything. – Muhammad Ali
  3. Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it’s all over. – Octavia Butler
  4. When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. – Henri Nouwen
  5. A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself. – Jim Morrison
  6. Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival. – C. S. Lewis

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My Journey through Life —with love {Part-3: Bonding with love}

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Another relationship where love happens automatically and without any complications is the one between siblings. Most siblings are known to fight in the early stages of their childhood and almost 90% of the sibling’s rivalries ends in the tightest bonds of friendship as they move into adulthood. In the early childhood days the relationship is more competitive depending on the age difference between the siblings but in almost all these relationships there is an underlying feeling of protectiveness. When an outsider threatens the relationship, the underlying love for each other shows up and they put on a united front to show their protectiveness towards each other. As they grow into adulthood they outgrow their petty fights almost always and they end up being life long friends. What is notable in this relationship is that here again is a relationship based on trust. Once again its blind trust and is unquestionable. Whenever a person needs comfort and there arises a  need to be loved or needed they more often than not turn to their siblings. Here they are sure that they will be trusted, well received, listened too and be loved even if they don’t deserve it.

We all know that people need loving the most when they deserve it the least. It is during those low moments that one needs someone who cares. One is sure in the fact that even if the world shuts them out and even if they don’t deserve it, their siblings are always there for them, that is the basis of this relationship.

I too have a brother and like most other kids fought like the proverbial cats and dogs. I remember beating him and getting beaten up royally by him. Ofcourse I would scream murder after that and get him into royal trouble with my parents. Regardless all thru my childhood I always believed and took it for granted that my brother would always be there for me. Well he was. Being the younger one I would always run to him when I had a problem and he was always there for me, though it was hard to admit I needed his help. Now as adults it comes very naturally to ask for his help, talk to him and pour my heart out. I am also very certain of his unquestionable love and trust, as I am, of my own pledge of love and trust for him. He is one person I can count on always and I know that he will be there for me, as I will for him, no questions asked. That’s the bond we share, that’s the miracle of this relationship. These are relationships which are pre-defined and exist within those parameters and under normal circumstances they function very close together, warmly and affectionately, co-existing but never demanding and always there when you need it.

In my relationship with my brother I realized that it never really mattered that there was a lot of age difference between us. What mattered was that we could connect and it wasn’t always that I needed help. Even though I was younger it never stopped him from sharing his troubles with me. Even if neither of us could do anything about the problem we still found solace in just talking to each other about it. What we both needed and got from each other was the knowledge that there is one person who loved the other a lot no matter what and that gives the strength to move on.


And then  you flip the coin and look at the other side! Sibling rivalry is as real as sibling love, be it Cain & Abel, Thor & Loki or the desi Ambani brothers, we have read all about them. The rivalry arising from a struggle for power and money. They say money can destroy anything and anyone. In the case of these power hungry people, it does stand true. In my journeys, I have come across some siblings who are constantly trying to do better than the other. They expend so much of energy just trying to think up of ways to beat the other. The negativity that starts when they were young stays with them even in their adult life. When talking to one such sibling pair, I was told that the main reason this competition actually started was because of favoritism shown by the parents. So one sibling invariably felt slighted and needed to constantly fight for attention. Yet, they say they don’t feel particularly happy at the other siblings misery but definitely feel miserable at the others’ success. It a competitive rivalry.

There is also the place value of the sibling that matters. Depending on what number you are at in your sibling line, the treatment you get also varies. If you are first in line, you have too much responsibilities, the middle ones are forgotten and the youngest get blamed for everything that happens. When there are many siblings, the oldest takes on the role of protector and cares for the younger ones, especially when there is a big age difference but in families where there are just two, the fight continues until they grow out of it.

To conclude, the typical sibling relationships are very simple. Everyone is sure of what they have and what they give. The boundaries are clear. Ultimately everyone is happy.

Here are some quotes, that sums it all up very beautifully:

  1. “To the outside world, we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other’s hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live outside the touch of time.”
  2. “Our siblings push buttons that cast us in roles we felt sure we had let go of long ago – the baby, the peacekeeper, the caretaker, the avoider…. It doesn’t seem to matter how much time has elapsed or how far we’ve traveled.”
  3. “I sought my soul, but my soul I could not see. I sought my God, but my God eluded me. I sought my brother and I found all three.”
  4. “Having lots of siblings is like having built-in best friends.”
  5. “Siblings are the people we practice on, the people who teach us about fairness and cooperation and kindness and caring–quite often the hard way.”

 

….coming up next is friendship! Stay tuned.

 

 

My Journey through Life —with love

PART I – Quote, Unquote.


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Every once in a while we sit down and ponder, about life. What we have made of it and how successful we are. Who am I  and am I who I wanted to be? We also reflect on all those moments, people and  relationships that shaped our life.  Some that have scarred us forever and some that have miraculously touched our heart.

In reflections, the one thing that comes to the forefront is the colorful emotions that we experience in life, emotions that most definitely define us and make us who we are. One emotion that inevitably comes to mind is ‘Love’. What is Love? Its importance, its meaning, its value and its origin?  The answers we seek and the answers we find usually do not match.

Some quotable quotes:

“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.”
Marilyn Monroe

“You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching,
Love like you’ll never be hurt,
Sing like there’s nobody listening,
And live like it’s heaven on earth.”
William W. Purkey

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
Dr. Seuss

or just Click on the link to read what Bob Marley says about love!

One American poet put it perfectly when he said, “Everyone admits love is wonderful and necessary yet no one agrees on just what it is.”

That’s absolutely true. Everybody talks about it, seem to have an opinion about it, have experienced it in someway or the other but most of them seem unsatisfied about the quality and quantity of love they have received. So I took it upon my self to go on a journey of finding the meaning of love. I wanted to put down the various changes an important emotion called ‘love’ goes through in life as a person grows and how it’s meaning changes in every relationship. How it changes you and makes you who you are.

Love is like soul food to a person. It is the elixir of life and brings us lot of joy. It can be so fulfilling that you feel secure in every breath you take. It brings out the best in you, making you more confident and puts a smile on your face. That is what love does to you but what does it actually mean? When I actually sat down to write this article I found myself at a loss for words as to how to describe love. It was difficult to put forth a rainbow of emotions in a page. So I will try to write it in parts, one color at a time!

So I was off on my journey, to find the meaning of love. Like everyone else I too tried the easy way out and made my first stop at the dictionary. What I found surprised me and left me more confused than ever.

Here’s what it said,

“ LOVE, n.,

–    a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person

  • a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for parent, child, or friend.
  • Sexual passion or desire
  • A person toward whom love is felt; beloved person sweetheart
  • Used in direct address as a term of endearment affection or the like
  • A love affair; an intensely amorous incident
  • Sexual intercourse; copulation
  • Personification of sexual affection, as Eros or cupid
  • Affectionate concern for the well-being of others
  • Strong predilection, enthusiasm or liking for anything
  • The object or thing so liked
  • The benevolent affection of god for his creatures or the reverent affection due from them to god
  • Out of affection or liking for pleasure without compensation; gratuitously
  • Feeling deep affection or passion for…; enamored of…
  • To have profoundly tender, passionate affection for…

– SYN: tenderness, fondness, predilection, warmth, passion, adoration, love, affection and devotion all mean a deep enduring emotional regard, usually for another person. Love may apply to various kinds of regard, the charity of the creator, reverent adoration toward God or toward a person, the relation of parent and child, the regard of friends for each other, romantic feelings for another person etc., Affection is a fondness for others that is enduring and tender, but calm. Devotion is an intense form of love and steadfast, enduring loyalty to a person; it may also imply consecration to a cause.

This was the meaning given in the dictionary!!! I guess by far this must be the longest explanation for a four-letter word in any dictionary. The fact that it needs such a lengthy explanation goes to say that there’s no one way to explain it and it still leaves some questions in the mind of the seeker. It was confusing. What is love? How do you differentiate between friendship, love and lust –the three parts of love? Why is it so important to a person’s life that it makes and breaks people? How much of love is enough? How do you measure love? And so on…

I realized there was more to love than what we see and hear. I often hear people saying when asked to describe love that “its hard to describe love, you have to feel it”. They are probably right, one has to experience it to know what it is. That is because the experience of love is unique to every person and only the person who has experienced it knows what was felt.  Love is the very essence of life. It brings everyone closer. It brings in trust, faith, affection and more importantly hope. It gives hope for a day filled with sunshine and that makes life go on. That’s the power of love. In every relationship it plays a different role and everywhere it leaves its mark.

When I asked my close friends what they felt about love and what they would do for love, I got all kinds of responses. Here is a brief assimilation of their responses.

“One has to be mature to know love and what happens at a younger age is infatuation and ………  Love involves a great deal of sacrifices and a give and take policy , in sacrificing something for your loved one there is a special feeling of joy. You get in return what you give , I don’t expect anything but love and affection that is all , on the other hand from my side I am willing to give all my love to the person involved.”

“Love is a little bit of Heaven here on Earth. Love is next to God to me…. the person to whom I say this means everything to me, and my world revolves around him/her In love the question as to how much can be given or expected can never arise.  Love to me is to give, give and give and when you give something it should not be measured in any terms.  And when you have given so much you automatically get it back, but how much you get back you never know and again it should not be measured.  This according to ME IS LOVE.”

“The word here is “mutual”… that’s what it is all about… how two minds and two souls work at tandem… in a seamless and synchronous way… freedom is an in-built attribute of this mutuality and the compromise has to come from both parties…. well, what percentage…? that’s debatable….. but I, personally,  would go to any extent of compromise… because you are doing it for someone u love… and that’s where ultimate happiness is to be found… so, that I guess is the bottom-line… no cribbing, being reasonable and being practical… is the essence of a true relationship…”

“It is bigger than life itself. When I think of love, I think of my kid first. Nothing in the world is more pure than the feeling I feel for my child. Love is sharing. To me the phrase “I love you” does not mean much. To me love is the feeling…the bond that keeps you going. I definitely don’t get carried away when my husband says “I love you”. But I most definitely get carried away when I see the concern or the struggle to want the best for me and our kid. Why is it that we make up and move on in spite of a vicious fight???? That to me is love! The joy I feel inside my heart when my child gives me a hug or a kiss…which nobody really told it to do. That to me is love.”

“Love is a state of mind, it’s probably the most abstract thing I’ve come across…. for one thing, when you love someone, you want to be with them. Not just be with them, but share everything with them. You have a great day at work and want to rush home and tell them every wonderful thing that has happened. You feel excited at the prospect of just being in their company, just being close to them isn’t enough, and you want to be a part of them, a part of their life forever. You can’t stand the thought of being away from them, yet when you are, you still feel that ever-present bond that ties you together wherever you go. You can almost feel what they are feeling. With a little bit of effort, you can see what they are seeing and think what they are thinking. It is almost as if you both can occupy each other’s bodies with complete trust and harmony. That to me is love…. plain old love.”

“Love is natural & irrational but very important ……Love is a moment that lasts forever…Love is everything, it is that catalyst, that real essence in Life. When I say I love someone I mean that this person is the one whom I have embraced totally (emotionally, mentally physically…etc) When I love someone all my saved up wishes start coming out When someone says that they love me it makes me elated, proud and privileged because one thing I know is that true love is one of the rarest things on this planet. True Love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about but few have seen. It also makes me feel responsible that I owe it to that person because when someone says that they love me I hope what they mean is “I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.  I would love to give everything for true love and expect nothing in return because, If you have Love you don’t need to have anything else. If you don’t have it, doesn’t matter much what else you do have.”

“Love………. should be unconditional……what a mother has for a child, what a child gives to a mother. ..that’s love….. Well one form of love —which in my mind is the purest of all….. When I say I love someone I mean that….for the most part I expect the same for the most part, i.e., unconditional love……the question is whether we all keep our word in this so-called pragmatic world.”

“Love is a two-sided coin. It can strengthen or stifle, expand or enfeeble, perfect or pauperize. When love is returned we are taken to new heights unseen, where it delights, invigorated and beautifies. When love is spurned we feel crippled, disconsolate and bereaved. Love is belonging to someone unconditionally”

“Love is unconditional ie. when your partner is happy you are happy. You do everything in your might to see them happy. Love is all about sharing, caring, trust and freedom. Love is how you feel when you are with them or even when u think about them. Love is pure and devoid of social stigmas and negativity “

“When being selfless comes naturally. That is love:)”

“Love always comes with expectations. Only love without expectations is with children. In this relationship there is only give, give and give”

“I experience love when somebody goes an extra mile and turns an impossible issue possible. For eg if a person knows about my likes and dislikes and gives importance to my likes …..then tell others that this is what she likes and this is what she dislikes….. that concern for me is just because they love me”

“Love is something which no words can explain. Love can only be felt from within. The warmth of love can make anything possible. Love makes a persons dreams come true. In short love makes you to fall in love with yourself and everyone, everything around you”

“ Love is Love only when it is selfless …… It is very very rare to find. What a husband feels for a wife or what a wife feels for a husband is NOT love I feel because it is not selfless. There are expectations in return. Even what a lover feels towards his or her lover isn’t Love because again ….There are expectations in return.”

“The only true instance of Love ….I feel ….is the love felt by a mother or father towards their child . There is no parallel to that sort of Love. That Love is blind. It ignores all faults and shortcomings of the child and expects nothing in return. Love cannot get purer than that ….”

So everyone had different theories on love. But almost everyone found the question difficult to answer and agreed that ‘love’ was an important part of their life. Some had it, some didn’t. The ones who had it wanted more and ones who didn’t felt they were incomplete.

In my next part, I will address the different forms of love a person comes across in his or her journey through life.

(To be continued) imgres-1

Forever

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 Over hills, over meadows,

Through the city streets,

Lakes oceans together flow,

A path from yonder,

To the sands of Jersey,

Flows a thread that binds

 

Joining hands,

Breaking paths,

Wandering tracks,

Penning thoughts

Roses to thorns, Souls to ashes

Will you be my friend?

Even after the sun sets down?

 

A thread of friendship,

An unknown togetherness,

Binding the pain around,

Making the promise unsaid,

I will be forever

Forever I will be.